Larmer Tree Festival 2008: Rated!

United Kingdom | by Alex Fahey | 22 July 2008

Overall - 8/10
More relaxed than a sloth at a health spa, the Larmer Tree's organisers create a slow-paced, culturally absorbing 5-day event.  The festival wakes you up with yoga lessons and sends you to bed at 3am with a lashing of Dubstep.  In between fans weave (literally in the case of the crafts field) through everything from folk to Egyptian Bedouin, demonstrating that the intimate 4000-capacity event doesn't shy away from variety.

Getting there and back - 3/10
Although a coach service did run from London, the single departure was too limited for our personal journey. Instead we opted for the optimistic travel approach: try our luck and see what happens. The nearest station to the festival is Salisbury - 17 miles away. The walk is a meandering trundle through small, national speed limit country lanes. A sporadic local bus also serves the area, but it finishes at 6pm and the nearest stop, which is four miles away, makes the journey only slightly shorter.

So thanks to the festival-goers who took us there (in exchange for £6 bottle of Vodka) and those who picked us up on the way back (Ian Dury discussions being suffice).  Both journey's better value than a £50 cab ride.

The Site - 7/10
Larmer Tree Gardens was originally owned by madcap explorer Pit Rivers. While alive he decorated his land with dramatic foreign artefacts, which still adorn the site today. The main stage is actually two stages set at a right angle to one another.  The one of the left is erected for the festival, but it is out shone by the garden's permanent stage to the right: a high, wooden structure, which has been painted as if it were part of a Constable landscape.

The rest of the site is small which makes it easy to navigate, but it's large enough to create the illusion of various arenas that are joined by woodland walks and intercepted by large ponds.  The only grumble is the plastic sheeting they lay in front of the larger stages. The thinking behind them is to preserve the grass underneath, but the end result is a permanent indent on the bottoms of those choosing to sit there all day long.

Atmosphere - 6/10
The nature of the festival means there are no festival thugs urinating in paper cups and launching them towards Kate Rusby. The mellow attitude of the audience is so laid back, it's a wonder they mustered the will power to drive themselves to the site, let alone put up tents. This means that very few bands manage to get people on their feet dacning or at the least tapping their toes, but when they do you can see the smiles thread themselves across the face of the audience like an epiphany: "so this is what jivin' does to them teenagers!"

A high point was the emergence of  hundreds of plastic balls (think ball pool) that were being thrown through the air Saturday afternoon.  The effect was very similar to the Sony advert, except the children started getting greedy and hording loads of balls - don't ruin it for the adults please!

Music - 8/10
If variety is the spice of life then this particular spice is a huge hot chilli, that makes you sweat, salivate and overindulge. The Larmer Tree line-up is so diverse there is an abundance of music you are guaranteed not to know - the travel costs of bringing to acts to the site must have been enormous (£50 cab ride from Salisbury station alone would soon add up). The world music scene is so enthusiastic that one weekend at Larmer Tree fills you with enough assortment you are glad you missed The Wombats performance at Isle of Wight/Glasto/V-Festival etc.

Uppers:

LaXula
This gothic, Spainish, East London hybrid were a definite highlight of the weekend.  They play dark, haunting songs, dripping with fear and punctuated by a percussionist playing a terracotta pot.  The enigmatic front woman, in a dark Victorian style dress, bounds across stage theatrically emphasising every word of every song, 'Foxes of London', proved very popular.  Although not everyone agreed, a gentleman behind us deemed them "inappropriate!" but this isn't 1976 and he's not Bill Grundy.  Bravo LaXula.

Bedouin Jerry Can Band
These boys win the award for the most infectious stage show all weekend.  Dress in full traditional robes and headscarves, they smiled and laughed all the way through their performance.  They also did the can-can to the delight of the crowd who cheered and can-canned themselves. The percussion heavy band allowed themselves just one break, while Amy Winehouse is handing out punches, the Bedouin Jerry Can Band are roasting and grinding Bedouin coffee beans before going out into the crowd to hand them out and you don't get that too often.

Taraf De Haidiouks
Bands are often criticised for not having the energy or the enjoyment to translate from record onto the stage, but this Romanian outfit have no such problems. The programme cites them as the 'best Gypsy band in the world' and with their songs being played at such thunderous speed, they are a sight to behold. The lead singer looks like Tony Soprano in a sharp suit and unusually a fishing hat, as he warns the crowd that they have to play quickly, they're booked to play in Cheltenham in two hours.  Let's hope for their sake they're not using public transport.

Kora
Saturday night headlines Kora, consisting of four brothers are one of New Zealand's top bands.  They manage to squeeze in as many influences that’s surely humanly possible.  Think AC/DC riffs, with dub bass, offbeat rhythm guitars and drum 'n' bass drums. Got that? You’re still not close.  Their furious live act ends with the band becoming statues and stopping freeze-frame.  This is followed by an encore, which starts slipping slowly into a power ballad, threatening to ruin their hard work, before the live drum 'n' bass beats kick in, sending the crowd into another hand-aching applause.

Downers:

Rachel Harrington
The highly tipped American folk singer fails to make an impression as part of such a strong line-up.  She boasts how she's, "been invited back to Oregon to play at a Patsy Kline tribute night for the last four years," but her slow, plodding and emotionless cover of Bobbie Gentry's 'Ode to Billy Joe' fails to register with the audience.  Perhaps 'Crazy' would have gone down better.

Ruarri Joseph
The charming singer songwriter is promoting material from his upcoming second album, but alas it falls short of his debut effort.  Although he is known to perform on his own, it is with a band that he thrives better.  As usual he performs 'Tales of Grime and Grit' in a capella, perhaps the old tricks are just wearing a bit thin.

Being shushed!
We can appreciate the fact that people want to listen to the artist on the stage and to a lesser extent people being irritated by dancing, but we're not happy with being shushed.  The diversity of groups mean we won't know every word to every song - but if we do can't we please sing along.

Big Kids
Not being allowed to join in with the children's activities.  As adults we were allowed to make jewellery, lanterns and willow sculptures, but weren't allowed to get creative with plastic milk bottles, paper and glitter.  We want to make the King Bat for the carnival!

Random Events

Paramedics Vs Morris Dancers Dance-off
I know what you're thinking - who would win in a dance-off Paramedics or Morris Dancers?  One group is trying to save lives; the other is trying to save a dying British tradition. It was a closely fought contest with the unlikely victors being (drum roll…) the Paramedics!  Please note, the Morris Dancers had no bells or sticks, it may have been just fancy dress.

Street Performers
Street performers acted out various types of theatre across the weekend. Two of the highlights were a milk float turned into a mobile disco; making beats with a laptop, milk bottles and wooden blocks. Secondly the Misguided Tours, which at one point managed to walk around 200 hundred people, hand in hand, across the front of the main stage and onwards into the woods.